Tuesday, September 8, 2015

Warby Parker: Round Two

One of my most popular blog posts is my Warby Parker evaluation.  Lucky for Warby Parker and all you googling lookey-loos, my slow descent into crappy eye sight has continued. My Clydes are no longer the right prescription for me and I need a new pair. Time for round two!

This time I'll only be looking at glasses from Warby Parker. Rivet and Sway went out of business for awhile and appear to be selling on glasses.com now. Sadly you can only get one pair at a time for at home try on so I don't think it'd be fair to compare. Get ready for some awkward selfies in my bright orange bathroom.

First up Keene. 
Consensus:  They remind me a lot of my last pair, which I liked but I'm ready for something different.

Next we Have Laurel
Consensus: maybe a little too large for my face and or taste

Chandler TI
Consensus: Solid contender. Frames are a little lighter than I'd like so I would probably get the darker version in Striped Pacific versus the English Oak I have on here. I like the metal arms

 Consensus: I feel like a librarian, in a good way.

Consensus: When I first tried these on in the mirror I thought,"oh helllllll no not for me." But now that I'm looking at them in the picture I think they are actually the most flattering. These might be my favorite.

Some notes on Warby Parker. The box arrived within 5 days as promised. One thing I did notice was different from last time is not all frames are available for home try on. I'm not sure why they would change that because there are only a few brick and mortar stores. Still, the majority of their frames are available through the home try on program (I counted 65 out of 85 for the women. Sorry dudes I didn't even look at yours.)

I'm leaning towards the last pair but I haven't made up my mind yet. What do you think? Should I keep looking? Order another box? Drive without corrective lenses? Paint my bathroom back to beige?

Thursday, August 27, 2015

Indoor Plants: Black Thumb Gardening

I've mentioned before my new obsession is plants. Well, it turns out passion does not translate into ability because I've killed a lot of plants in this endeavor. So many plants. In such cruel ways: lack of attention, too much attention,  cats eating them, or freezing them over night in my car.

I recently skyped with my mom, plant lady extraordinaire, for some advice. Along with useful tips she warned me "you're going to kill a lot of plants along the way while you learn"  which made me feel a little better about the brutality I've shown the plant kingdom.

When I first posted about my plant love, Alyssa suggested I do a post about plants. I was super flattered she thought I knew enough to merit a whole blog post when in real life I had plants dropping dead all around me, but having been newly imbued with confidence from my mother, I figured what the hell. Here we go!

So if you're a black thumb gardener you should start off with the two plants varieties I've tortured for years and they have lived to tell the tale. The winners of my biotic "Hunger Games?" Air plants and Mother-In-Law's tongue (It's growing back! It's growing BACK!)

So Airplants:

They come in crazy different sizes, shapes and colors but pretty much all require the same conditions. Indirect light and occasional soaks in water. The hipster at the Portland terrarium store suggested a 5 minute daily soak, with one overnight soak every other week (or as needed if they are looking wrinkled because wrinkled = dehydrated.) And then the hipster at the Denver store suggested just one 30-60 minute soak per week.  I've compromised on two half-hour soaks per week, and making sure to shake out the excess water to prevent rot.

(PS Can you see the above pic from Instagram? It's not showing up for me but I wonder if it's just my computer being goofy?)

When I was living in Ohio, these plants really thrived in my bathroom. I had a north facing window with diffused glass which provided enough filtered light and humid atmosphere from the shower that they thrived by being run under the faucet once a day. My Colorado apartment has no window in the bathroom so they're kickin' it in my living room (North and Western light, not sitting in the window directly.)

Don't know where to find air plants near you? You can order them off Etsy. Don't worry, they'll be fine during shipping, unless you are shipping to freezing temperatures in which case you will have to pay extra for a heat pack.

Even less maintenance than the air plant is the aforementioned mother-in-law's tongue (also known as snake plant or Saint George's sword). These are my incredible survivors. You can abuse them all you like: put them in a dark room, forget to water them for a month,  leave them freezing overnight in a car (TWICE), and God bless them, they'll hold onto life. I usually water them once every other week or whenever they feel dry. Test dryness by sticking your finger in the soil about an inch. If it still feels moist, wait a few more days.

But seriously I think you could do just about anything to these guys and you'll be fine.

Apart from starting out with these two very forgiving plants, I have a few other simple tips I've learned from my mom and trial and error.

1. Don't go to Home Depot with the expectation of receiving help with indoor plants. With exception to my mom, who used to be a plant guru at her local Home Depot, the garden department associates nationwide are wholly unhelpful and the labeling is dismal. Everything says "House plant" with no further information. (I HOPE YOU'RE READING THIS, HOME DEPOT MANAGEMENT!) You can certainly buy there, but you will have to do your own research to discover what they actually are.

2. Don't fight your climate/light conditions.  I kept trying to buy tropical plants that need a lot of water. Surprisingly they died in my apartment located in the high desert.

3. If you have pets consult here first to ensure they aren't poisonous. Some cut Gladiolus for my kitchen table turned into an emergency trip to the vet for gastroenteritis. Sad times for Gremlin, the rugs he barfed on, and my wallet.

4. Start out slow. Don't bring home 10 different kinds at once; you'll be overwhelmed. Buy one or two, learn what they like, where they are happy in your home and then add on. I am guilty of overbuying. It always leads to dead plants.

5. If you put your plants in a glass terrarium for the love of god don't put them in direct sunlight, it will fry the leaves and you'll be so sad like my poor half-dead mallemonti clump (the one near the pterodactyl.)

Happy growing!

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

A Very Bloggy Problem

If you've had a blog for any given amount of time, I'm sure you've found an email like this in your inbox more than once:

Subj: Great Blog!

Hi Blogger! I'm so-and-so from XYZ company! We do this. We'd love for you to write a post for us on some topic related to what we do. Don't forget to mention our name! Please do this out of the kindness of your heart by the end of this month.


When I first started receiving these emails I was excited! Flattered even. It meant people were finding me. One even said they'd link to my post on their Twitter account. (Will write for page views, I know, I'm so cheap.) So I did a few. And then.... nothing. No increase in traffic or readership, not even a measly $10 for my trouble. The one company never even linked to my post.

Now. I know I'm not a big blogger. I'm not even a medium blogger. I'm microscopic in blogland.  But that doesn't mean my time isn't valuable and I should work for nothing.

That's why being small is a good thing: I write what I want, when I want to because I enjoy it. I'm not beholden to someone else for content or timelines.  I'm not gonna whore out my little space on the internet just to receive vague compliments from the cheesy SEO directors. Come at me with something real.  Give me a reason, however small, to want to write for you. Then maybe we'll talk.